If you have a relationship you would like to mend, ask yourself whether you might be trying to fix them? Do you spend your time with them giving them advice on how to overhaul their lives? I am talking about saying things like,” throw the bum out”, “You should look for another job” and “I wouldn’t put up with that.”
I appreciate the way you’ve discussed the subtle underlying message sent by advice giving. It can be patronizing and insulting when it isn’t requested. It can be a game of cat and mouse. I like your suggestion of letting go of advice giving while staying engaged with questions showing interest.
Ironically, it is very good advice: not to give advice unsolicited. I have a friend who often gives advice to me which is at times useful, but when I think about it afterwards I feel put down. I've been wondering how to respond to her, maybe you can have some suggestions in future posts.
I appreciate the way you’ve discussed the subtle underlying message sent by advice giving. It can be patronizing and insulting when it isn’t requested. It can be a game of cat and mouse. I like your suggestion of letting go of advice giving while staying engaged with questions showing interest.
Ironically, it is very good advice: not to give advice unsolicited. I have a friend who often gives advice to me which is at times useful, but when I think about it afterwards I feel put down. I've been wondering how to respond to her, maybe you can have some suggestions in future posts.